On toddler time

Yesterday was a very different day than usually for my little man and me. We are used to routine. Every weekday we get up and get dressed with the help of Dada. We climb haphazardly into ‘mamma car’ and drive off to school. There we share the majority of the day with our little toddler buddies, from breakfast to diaper changes and every adventure in between.

Today however, he and I were alone at home while Mamma had to run loads of errands, some of which included *gasp* using the computer without the help of the bunz. We were on a strict time schedule as I had to be at school/work by the early afternoon. Collin was on toddler time.

I felt the pressure of accomplishing all of this with him before I got out of bed. He was a great help, and for the most part I kept a calm exterior, anxiety taking route in the pit of my stomach. However, as I watched the minutes tick by and felt less getting accomplished I started to feel the anxiety rise within me. I started to rush him slightly. Started to push him past what should be developmentally expected for a toddler. Maybe I even rolled my eyes at him once or twice.

“Come on, just come up the stairs…yes, yes, I see the wall, hold the wall if you want, just come up the stairs!”

Collin bunz looked quizzically into my eyes as if to say “Alright Mamma, I was just discussing it with you, geeze!”

Things got done, I continued to get more tense, and we made it to the door. I asked him to go get his shoes and turned to print something off the computer.

This is what I found

My baby’s big brown eyes staring up at me, in MY black flats, holding a water bottle bigger than his head. Water dribbling down his Elmo shirt. He said “come on Mamma!” As he walked to the door in MY shoes with his huge water bottle.

I felt the question rise in me. Do I wrestle with him to put on his shoes, socks, leave the water bottle behind etc? Lay down the law, show him who was in charge here? Or just LET. IT. GO.

And so I did.

It may not seem like much, moms everyday run around busy, busy, busy. Toddlers push buttons and are not the most cooperative sort.

But on that morning, as he toddled out the door in MY shoes. Climbing into his car seat, with shoes in had and a beaming smile. I knew I chose humor, joy, and maybe a time delay.

I chose gentle, compassionate parenting and I felt at peace for the first time that day.

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